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Thursday 20 May 2010

Cuckoos in the Nest

Cuckoos in the Nest

I’ll admit it: whenever Amir Khan boxes, I want him to lose. I had hoped Paul Malignaggi was going to knock his head off on Saturday night, but sadly my hopes were dashed. The Guardian readers will cry ‘racist’ at such a thing, but I think I have valid reasons. You see, I object to someone who parades both the Union Jack and the flag of Pakistan around simultaneously. For me, the two are completely incompatible.

Now, my long-term girlfriend happens to be French. During the Six Nations, she cheers England on against the other teams, but when it comes to ‘Le Crunch’, it’s cries of Napoleon, Jeanne d’Arc and waving of the Fleur de Lys. But it’s all good-natured stuff and I support France against the Italians. So, if I can support France on some occasions, why can’t I support Amir Khan, who, we are told, is British? After all, he’s won his much-vaunted silver Olympic medal for Great Britain.

Well the difference is that he describes himself as a British Asian Muslim and the last I knew Britain wasn’t in Asia and Islam wasn’t a religion to which the indigenous population had willingly converted – in fact, the indigenous population seem to pretty much resent its presence in Great Britain – just as the indigenous French population want rid of the hordes of North African Muslims in France, who are causing all the same problems as the hordes of Pakistani, Bangladeshi and Somali (among others) Muslims in our country. My girlfriend is Christian and indigenous European and if the by-now horrified Guardian readers want to know if that means I think I have more in common with her than a British Asian Muslim, you’re damned right it does. She also wholeheartedly supports my work for the British National Party.

And let’s be honest, the Union Jack is only a flag of convenience for Amir Khan. The Khan family would rather the crosses be more crescent-shaped, perhaps with a little star alongside. After all, Khan’s younger brother Haroon has decided that now he hasn’t been picked for the Great Britain boxing squad at the Commonwealth Games this year, he’s going to fight for Pakistan. Even if I had the talent to compete at anything at international level, I would only ever dream of representing Great Britain – that or nothing.

Khan’s father Shah said he was not being given a proper chance to get into the squad and accused the ABA of having something against Amir’s achievements as reasons for Haroon’s failure to be selected. He stopped just short of using the ‘r’ word.  But the glaring fact is that Haroon is only ranked 10th in the country in his weight division and didn’t even reach the quarter finals at this year’s ABA Championships. He simply isn’t good enough.

So, you’re probably wondering, when I come to have kids, and if they become good enough to compete internationally at a sport, which country will they compete for? England/Great Britain or France? Well, of course I’d like them to compete for my country, but in the end, if they were to compete for France, I wouldn’t be too hard on them! After all, it’s only sport.

So then what’s the problem with competing for Pakistan? Well, one only has to look at the way Pakistan is going. Already, the provinces near the Afghan border are pretty much under Taliban control. In time, the whole of Pakistan will be under Shariah Law – that’s the way the whole Islamic world is going – and when it happens, Pakistan will send troops to get ours out of Afghanistan and Iraq, and we will, in effect, be at war with Pakistan. So, which side do you think the Khan family will be on if push comes to shove?

In contrast, Britain and France have not been at war with each other for well over a century and never will be again – unless one goes Islamic. And if it’s Great Britain, I will find myself at war against my own country. But it will no longer be my country.